Wednesday, June 19, 2002 :::

bored outta my head, so might as well blog.

cleaned out my closet with the 'rents last week...-definitely a wise decision with positive outcome. i basically un-lied everything i've lied to them about - all the big lies that i remember, anyway. lying to my parents has gotten very, very old - my conscience is very exhausted, and my stomach is sick and tired of being sick and tired. soooo, no more drinking (at all) for 2 whole years...unless the circumstances would allow for me to be confident in receiving approval from my parents. it's totally not worth the risks involved, anyway...and i've witnessed first-hand the physical, emotional, psychological and legal consequences that often follow: frightening/pathetic/imbecilic/that's enough for me. think what you will, think what you may - my mind is made, the stance is solid.

let's bitch a little. this being-skinny-business has got to go. i'm stockin' up on Carnation Instant Breakfasts, other milkshakes, chocolate milk, and other stuff to get me fat. ANY AND ALL SUGGESTIONS FOR FATTENING FOODS ARE MORE THAN WELCOME. i may resort to something like Weight Gainer 2000...-we'll have to see how the shakes and instant breakfasts go. exercise is also a must...gotta start running regularly. lifting 20 lb dumbbells thrice a day isn't going to cut it.

songs of the summer thus far:
"Your Signs" by Nonpoint
"Sway" by Vanessa Carlton
"Letters to You" by Finch
and others that i can't quite remember at this moment.

19th birthday came and went - for the first time, i'm actually kinda' not for the getting-older-thing. 20 seems old. juan and will are 20...but...i never thought about it before my b-day. no more teens. childhood - kaput...kinda sorta. i dunno, it's all psychological, but this past one was the first birthday that made me stop and think for a second. is it truly possible to remain young-at-heart without forcing it at least a little bit? here's to staying young-at-heart *raises glass of water to screen*

coming soon...a review of what might have been the worst concert i've ever witnessed: Piebald, Glassjaw, and The Juliana Theory.

-aj

::: posted by AJBrotz at 11:48 PM

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